huge smile

Jiu-jitsu is the favorite part of my day ;-)

retelling stories

I woke up from a dream this morning where I was talking to someone while babysitting (or something strange like that. babysitting? weird dreams lately.)  

In the dream I was retelling a story I heard in ASL class last night. That in itself is weird. I've never told a story while dreaming before. Come to think of it, I don't do a lot of talking in my dreams... weird, never thought about that. I don't really talk at all in my dreams.  I can't think of one I've ever had where there's any talking. Strange. 

Ok, so I did have that dream the other night where I was punching people that said things I didn't like. But the thing is, there were no words, like spoken words. I didn't hear anything. I don't think I have sound in my dreams. Or maybe I just can't remember it? 

Maybe I will remember it in some future dream now that I've thought about it.  

Even in this dream I know I was "talking" to the person but there was no words.  It's more like you just look at them and they know what your'e saying.

Anyway, here's the story. Apparently it made some sort of impression on me because it made it into my dream.

The story is about this Russian guy who came to the US and he didn't know that much American sign but was fluent in Russian sign. He meant to say, "I'm from Moscow". But apparently the Russian sign for "Moscow" is the same as the American sign for "menstruate" - lol!

It was even funnier when the teacher told the story because there was this deaf guy helping her out for the day and he saw her sign it before she said what it meant to the rest of us. Right as she signed it he turned his head away and did one of those half-laugh, half-embarrassed sounds. Which created an excellent effect in the story telling, making us all wonder what she was about to say.

note to self...

Do not attempt to do the following things at the same time:

• Work (computer is on)
• Be warm (heater in office is on)
• Pre-warm bedroom (heater in bedroom is on)
• Make popcorn (microwave is on)

This trips the circuit breaker at which point 3 out of 4 of the above items stop. Oddly enough the microwave is still popping. This is good because you can eat it while you're waiting for your computer to boot up again. 

That is after you've made your way through the dark (because the circuit it trips turns off all the lights in the entire house while the appliances and furnace stay on) to feel your way around the breaker box and flip all the random switches since you can't actually see anything. 

I should find that flashlight I have somewhere around here.

My guess is that the furnace was the culprit. It probably got cold and it turned on and then *poof* everything else goes off.  

Oooh, it's 26 degrees outside! Brrr.

Shell station on River Road

The last two times I stopped at the Shell station on River Road the gas station attendant filling my car has asked to take a picture of my car with his cell phone. Two different guys, same gas station. 

That hasn't happend at any other gas station (at least not where the person filling is taking the photo). Although, people wave at me from both the 76 and the Cheveron stations on So. Willamette.

before / after

Despite the fact that it was 40 degrees out, I washed the car!

That's pretty impressive I think.

It really needed it huh.

There was actually several tablespoons of grime stuck
in the corners of the wheels... each one!

Through the Fog on Willamette

a few more...

Fog

You know when you open a freezer and all this fog comes put at you? Well that what happened when you opened the door to leave bjj tonight. Lots of fog swirled in as the cold air outside met the warm (very warm) air inside.

funny dreams

No really, I was laughing in my dream. I'm pretty sure I've never laughed in my dreams before. At least not the ones I remember. I tend to have very solemn dreams. Solemn and strange, but not funny. Ever.

But I had three different dreams that I remember last night. The all involved friends. The first one was kinda solemn and I don't actually remember it anymore. I did when I woke up the first time but not anymore. I remember the feeling though. It's like a black and white with no sound kinda feeling.

The second I remember more of. There was me in the Bronco and Jill was there. We were driving down some road but then the road ended, at least the paved road did. And there was this sand road going downhill that I wasn't sure I should go down, but she pushed the Bronco and we went down. (That description may sound a little confusing but in my dreams things don't really follow the rules of the regular physical world. So while we were in the car initially, she was able to push the car down the hill from behind and then we were all transported down together, even though we weren't actually in the car anymore. Maybe I just switched from first person to third person perspective - I don't really know. Like I said, it doesn't make a lot of sense usually.) So we're flying down this hill. Fast. Like not really rolling on the wheels but just hovering over the ground and rolling down really fast and it ends at the ocean. (And it's night, forgot to say that earlier.)  So needless to say I can't stop the car in time and we go crashing into the ocean. 

Now, to start off, this actually does sound like a lot of my dreams. I'm driving and then I'm out of control and then it's over. But this is different.

We open the doors immediately and the water is up to the seats already, which on the Bronco is pretty high! So we jump out and I'm thinking I'm going to loose the car but then I decide to just grab on to the back of it and pull it out and it works. Easily! With no effort. I just pull it back onto the sand and leave it there to dry out. I'm pretty sure I was having a good time at this point. I was in quite a jovial mood.

There's a cliff behind us and some sort of workout place up on the edge with big windows overlooking the ocean. We go up there and we're walking down a hallway and I don't remember everything anymore but Jill falls down on the floor laughing hysterically and then I'm laughing too. I think it's because we just drove the Bronco into the ocean and she thought it was really funny in an, "I can't believe that just happened" kind of way.

And then I wake up. 

Ok, third dream. This one involves Mel I think and Jake is there too. 

This time we're trying to drive up this really huge cliff (it's a theme apparently) to this city on the top of a plateau.  The car won't make it up so we end up climbing (but it doesn't take long, like a second). We get to the top and it's bland desert-like city. Sand on the ground everywhere, no paved roads, but roads nonetheless. The buildings are all one story and the color of sand.

We run into this guy who says something mean and I start beating him up.  Then something else happens which I'll just leave out. About the beating up though. I've never beat someone up in my dreams before. And this was weird, like a movie in a way. Where it didn't hurt me at all to hit the person and there were thwacking type sounds when I did and he just lied there on the ground not fighting back. And come to think of it, I don't think he was hurt either. Strange. Lots of new strange dream experiences.

Come to think of it a lot of my dreams are just me observing strange places. Either that or being chased but never caught (but always about to be caught). Or the third kind, which are the ones where I'm driving and out of control. Occasionally there will be a flying dream but often I have to try really really hard and can barely get off the ground. Like I'm trying to hard and it's making it not happen.

Anyway, in the next "scene" I'm inside some party with Mel but Jake is gone now. She says something that I don't like and I punch her in the face. (she probably won't read this, but I can picture her offended reaction if she did). And then I think wow, that actually hurt my hand, this must be real and not a dream. So I apologize and tell her, "Sorry, I thought I was dreaming still." Like that's supposed to make some sort of difference??? I don't know. Then I think I just wander around being confused as to whether I'm dreaming or awake. 

I was probably pretty much almost awake by then. It was like noon and the 3rd time I'd woken up this morning. Every time I woke up before though, it was like I barely woke up and was totally pulled back into sleep. 

It made for an interesting morning.

Roku and a weird smell

There were 10 minutes left in class and I wanted to leave. Mostly because I could barely stand. I came in an hour early and drilled some take downs. And then class consisted of endless rounds of pass/keep the guard - for two hours. Don't get me wrong. I had a lot of fun. I could just barely lift my arms by the end. The white belts were in one group and the colored belts were in another. It was good cause I got to roll with a lot of different blue belts. But everyone is heavy. I'm not complaining (at least not too much). I like it. Once I get to roll someone my same size it will seem comparatively easy. So it's good. It's just hard at the end of 2 hours. But there were 10 minutes left. I figured I made it that far I might as well stick it out for the next 10 min. So I did.

I came home and got something to eat and sat down to watch a movie to relax a little before going to work. I've been having a lot of fun with my Roku player. I was hooking my laptop up to the projector before to stream movies off Netflix, but then something happened and that port stopped working. The rest work, but that one doesn't. It's not the laptop cause I tested it by hooking it up to my monitor which worked fine. And it's not the cord cause I tried another one. So it's definitely the port on the projector that's got something wrong with it. 

Now I could just stream movies on my main computer in my office. But I figure I spend enough hours in there anyway. Plus, why would I want to watch them on a 19" monitor when I could sit on my very comfortable couch and watch it on the 9 foot screen on the wall ;-)

Anyway, I was sitting there watching this movie (left), which turned out to be pretty funny.  The selection of streaming movies on Netflix was pretty limited before they've been adding a lot more lately. I can pretty much find something for any occasion, as in whatever mood I happen to be in.  

So I'm sitting there and I start noticing this smell. What is that? Eww, it smells like jiu-jitsu. But I took a shower. Where is that coming from. I ignore it but it keeps bugging me and then I realize, it's my Gi. It doesn't smell very appealing after rolling with sweaty guys for 2 hours. I laid it out on the weight bench to dry but that's not going to do it.  I was clean, just out of the wash when I went in today. And now, it's going back in the wash. I was smelling it from like 15 feet away. Gross.

...

On a side note, I think I found what I was looking for today. I didn't recognize it at first but the more I think about it, the more potential I see. Maybe even a two in one or three in one deal. We'll have to see.  That's why you have to keep your windows rolled down, so you can hear opportunity when it knocks.

can you hear your eyeballs?

"Some people have abnormalities of the inner ear that enhance their sensitivity to this component so much that the sound of their own breathing becomes overwhelming, and they may even hear their eyeballs moving in their sockets."

SciAm.com

That would be so freaky!

And annoying.

ASL

First day of ASL class. Really good. Confusing, but really good. We were sitting there in silence for so long, then when the teacher asked if we wanted a break half way through and this one lady was like, "Yes, I need to use my voice. I've never sat somewhere for so long without talking."

The teacher (who's parents were deaf) told this story at the end where she goes to a friends house for a sleepover for the first time in her life. She's like 12 and they go into her friends house and her friend starts talking to her parents. Just talking like normal people do, but to her it was really confusing. She was thinking, "You people are so weird!!! You talk to your parents?"

It's always a strange feeling when you realize that what's "normal" to you is not normal to everyone else and their normal is not normal for you.  And if you've never thought of whatever it is before, or experience it, then it does seem really strange. Even if it's completely "normal," just cause it's a totally new experience. 

People don't get it. They just stare at you like you're making a big deal out of nothing. But it's totally different when it's something new for you. Like taking people from a village where they all grow their own food and showing them a supermarket. It's just a totally new concept.

snowboarding

I think I was on auto pilot on the drive up. Maybe because I just woke up and jumped in the car (not a morning person).  So I was halfway up the lift when I realized, "Hey, I'm about to go snowboarding!" Followed by, "Oh crap, here comes the dismount; I hope I don't fall on someone."

I didn't. It was pretty fun. There was a giant rainbow at the top of the lift which was cool. 

I listened to a really interesting episode of Fresh Air on the way back about gold. Apparently all the gold ever mined by humans will fit into two Olympic size swiming pools! I've never been intrested in gold but this was pretty engrossing. Check it out here.

The clouds were raining fire

It was awesome from every angle and every road and it just kept going. Any picture I could take would be incommensurate with the actual spectacle, but here is one anyway.

Lorane highway

The sky is ON FIRE and the rising moon is massive. At first I thought it was a snowy peak behind another mountain. But then it rose a little higher and I realized it was the moon. Huge. It's always bigger on the horizon but this was twice as big as I've ever seen before.

SciAm: Tonight's moon will rival last month's massive bright perigee

Exciting! I knew the moon looked brighter last night!

Remember last month's massive moon, the one that dazzled onlookers on December 12? That moon was 14% larger and 30% brighter than a typical full moon.

Well, it's back tonight. NASA says tonight's moon will be the biggest full moon of 2009, "almost identical" to the one on December 12.

Here's what's going on: The moon's orbit of Earth is an ellipse, with one end closer to Earth than the other. Tonight, the moon will be near the closer end of the ellipse, a spot known as the perigee. (Apogee is the more distant end.)

SciAm.com

I hope it's clear out. Last time it was an amazing night. 

SciAm: Inside the Savant Mind: Tips for Thinking from an Extraordinary Thinker

From the article...

In my mind, numbers and words are far more than squiggles of ink on a page. They have form, color, texture and so on. They come alive to me, which is why as a young child I thought of them as my “friends.” I think this is why my memory is very deep, because the information is not static. I say in my book that I do not crunch numbers (like a computer). Rather, I dance with them.

and...

Various studies have long demonstrated that being able to visualize information makes it easier to remember.

Soooooo interesting! Read the article here.

inbox cleaning

currently at 24, down from 65 eariler today

.......nice.

Boy stops pit bull attack with jujitsu choke hold

My mom sent me this link: 

http://www.kval.com/news/37188184.html

picturing things in your mind

In a follow up to the post on the fact that I can't recognize faces very well... I've been surveying people and apparently most of you out there can do math in your head because you can "see" the numbers.  Like 26+32, or something like that.  I can't "see" the numbers in my head.  They won't stay there. I would have to say, "ok, 26 - so 6 is the 2nd number, and then, 32 so 2 is the other 2nd number. so that would be 6 and 2 is 8.  And then would have to try and remember what the two original numbers are again 26 and 32 in order to figure out what the next two numbers that I needed to add were.  And on top of that I would have to remember that 8 was the other number that I just added up.  But I would have to remember that in some place in my mind because I can't actually "see" this stuff, even in my head. So invariably I would get confused and forget something after I added the 1st two numbers. I would probably have to double check to make sure I had the two main numbers correct, the ones I was trying to add together.

I basically can't picture anything in my head. I can recognize if something matches what I think it should look like, but that's not because I'm comparing it to a mental picture. I think my mind sees things more like a grid. It's like a yes/no thing where it matches up certain points and says, this is in the same place and that's in the same place, so this must be the same thing. I know I'm very spatially aware of things. I have some sort of picture in my mind of where things are and I will notice if they've been moved. Just like how I noticed that the "cap" thing they put on the door of my Lotus wasn't the one that was on it before, even though I'd never really paid attention to it. And I notice if things have moved and are not in the same spot as last time I saw them. So there must be some sort of picture that my mind is comparing what it's seeing now to what it was seeing before. But it's not like a picture you'd see on a camera. I think it's more like a grid with dots on it. Not that I "see" a grid. I don't "see" anything. I just have recognition that's like, "alert: object at x,y is not what it was last time we saw this." I don't know what was there before necessarily, but I know it wasn't what it is now.

I'm not sure how my facial or people recognition system works. Melissa kept telling me that I never noticed when her hair changed, which I think was or is often. I couldn't actually tell you if she changes it much right now because I don't remember.  I know from talking to her that she changed it a lot in the past. 

I was thinking about this several months, about recognizing people and how I couldn't picture things and I realized that I didn't even know if her hair was straight or not. I think it's because I've seen it both ways. Maybe it's because she changes her hair so much that I don't remember it. Because it's not one of those constant things that I can use to identify her.  I think some people's hair I do remember, but it's only if they keep the same style. My mom has had the same hair forever, so I know what hers is like. 

Maybe I just pick things out that don't change and use those as identifying features. If you wear the same clothes then I might recognize you from that. I might even recognize you from the shape of your whole silhouette. I think I can recognize someone I know from a picture of just one part of their face, like a close up.  

But new people, that's harder. I think it takes longer for me to assign a profile to a certain person. Melissa kept trying to point out Jake to me last month and I got him and this other guy that started at the gym near the same time confused, for like two weeks. They kind of looked the same to me. I would see one walking across the mat and I'd see the other one a few minutes later and I wouldn't know which is which. I can tell now, but the first couple weeks I couldn't.

Hmmm, interesting.

geometry and memory

In high school I got a C in Geometry and an A the next semester in Algebra 2. The algebra 2 class seemed like kindergarten to me. I had the same teacher for both classes and she was kind of confused at why I was suddenly a math whiz from one month to another.  She gave us an outline for the semester and I was two weeks ahead on my homework and getting paid to tutor this other girl in class.

The thing is, all the Geometry tests were about memorizing the theorems and postulates. And memorizing stuff is NOT my thing. I tried. I read the damn things over and over. I made cassette tapes and played them back to myself. I spent a lot of time on them but I couldn't remember them. I don't remember words well. I can remember concepts, but words are practically impossible.

Maybe it's a short term memory thing. 

When I'm programming something new that's kind of complicated. I will get to the end and can't remember what I just did or what process I used to accomplish what I just finished.  I have to go back and read over the code to figure out how I did it. And if I were going to do it again and didn't have my notes to look at I'd have to start from scratch and re-create the whole thing over again becasue I might not be able to even remember the concept of what I had just done.

I can't remember words very well either. I remember the meaning of something that somebody just said. But if you asked me to repeat it back word for word there's a 99% chance that I'd be guessing if it was more than three words long. If it were a common string of words I might guess correctly, but it would still be a guess.

When I'm learning a new move in jiu-jitsu, they go over it step by step several times. Then they say to go ahead and practice and 90% of the time I can't remember what position the move starts in. I can remember the end of the move, the part I just saw, but I can't remember how to start. I tend to remember things as "this connects to that". But I have to do it step by step and can't really see the whole thing. I see it as a series of connections - from this move you go here, and from this move you go here - and that's the way it makes the most sense to me. If you tell me to just try it without thinking about it I'm likely to just stare at you cause I don't know how to do that. I feel like I can remember little parts and put them together and it makes something bigger, but the big thing is still always just a bunch of little parts put together.  Until you've drilled it a lot of times at which point it just turns into muscle memory. But that's completely different. 

wake up

Apparently I was not supposed to sleep in today. The FedEx guy rang the doorbell at 9 (that's early I'm telling you). And then Stormy called me shortly after that. And then I was just awake. That's fine. I got some stuff done early today. 

I opened the door to get my package and the paper.  It's a lot warmer out.  I still can't get over how 50 degrees feels kind of warm to me here. It's just right at the edge where it no longer seems freezing cold (to me).

Reminds me of those people I saw coming out of the Eugene Airport in the summer.  They were probably late 40's and the lady is complaining, and I mean majorly complaining about how hot it was - about 90 degrees. But she acted like she was melting. Then the guy behind her looks at me and says, "We're from Alaska." Totally made me laugh. Everything's relative.

AAA strikes again

Nothing like locking your keys in the car to make you appreciate AAA service.  Second time I've called them in the last few months. It was for towing last time, not keys. It's come in handy ever since I got it for the moving truck discount when I came up to Oregon.

In this case we were just arriving back to Eugene and we stopped at 7 Eleven for some Gatorade. Mel was driving and I got out of the car and pushed the door locks from habit.  I thought for a second before I shut the door (maybe I shouldn't?) , but figured she wouldn't close her door with the keys still in the car. I thought wrong.

Then I turn around and the car in the parking spot next to us was sliding back out of it's parking space due to the slope in the parking lot. The car was on, the radio was on, the parking brake was off and the driver was inside. I stepped behind the car and held it in place long enough for Melissa to retrieve the driver from the store so they could pull the car back into it's space. They looked a little embarassed. I thought it was funny. I've never held a car in place before. The wheel was turned so it was kind of backing out behind the bronco, which clearly wasn't going anywhere since we were now locked out. I didn't really need to stand behind the car. It probably would have stopped somewhere in the middle of the parking lot. But I just figured it was better off 1/4 of the way in the space than in the middle of the parking lot.

So we went in and got the Gatorade. We both had our wallets but our phones were in the Bronco. Luckily we were just 4 blocks from her house so we walk/jogged back and I used Jake's phone to call AAA.  It didn't take too long for them to get there and open it up.

AAA is convenient and, at least for me, has been an overall moneysaver.

the bronco

I drove to WA with Mel today for an appointment. We took the Bronco cause it had better tires. 

I like the Bronco. It's been growing on me since the first time I saw it. I wasn't expecting to get a Bronco. I wasn't looking for one specifically. I was looking for a winter vehicle with 4x4 for the snow and something with a few more seats than the Lotus. I went to this lot on River Road to see what they had because I'd seen a lot of trucks there before. Actually I think I went because I saw an ad online for a smaller Bronco II that had been towed behind an RV. But it was baby blue :-P  But I also knew they had a lot of trucks there.

So I was looking at the rest of their trucks and I saw that the Bronco was in my price range. So I looked inside it. At first glance the thing seemed huge. Especially after driving the Lotus around. Side by side comparison seen here. It's like driving the room of a house around.

But it's not too long. Which would make it hard to maneuver. I remember getting inside and looking behind me from the drivers seat like I was going to be backing out and it seemed nice and homey feeling.. and not too long. That was the first instant I started to like it.

I don't drive it much because I find the gas mileage generally abhorrent. But it was really fun in the snow a few weeks ago. I never would have made it out Fox Hollow without it. And it was fun driving it to WA today. It's like driving your living room around.

I think I'll keep it.

Learning stuff is fun

Who needs sleep anyway...

Probably not what I will be thinking in the car later today, but right now I'm having a good time.

currently reading...

upside down

...i just printed all the envelopes upside down :-P

ha... ha...... ugh.

You would think I have a problem, but I assure you I don't. I blame multitasking (read: I stuck them in the printer and walked off). Not that I haven't done this before. Just not recently and never all of them. I usually check to make sure they're coming out right.

Oh well, I'm not wasting them. People are just going to have to deal with it.

ha ha!

I forgot the billing existed!

(Yeah, I know. It's really not that funny.)

I've got to pay more attention to the dates. These holidays are screwing me up. It's like two weekends per week with Christmas and then New Years stuck right in the middle of the week.

Anyway, guess what I'm doing now...

too sore to roll

I tried but I think I need to lay off a bit. It was easier to let myself be squished than try to escape. Well, not with the white belts. I escaped from them. It was just hard with Ryan and I got him last. We did pass and keep mount. My shoulders and my biceps are sore, sore, sore. And so are my calves. I need to stretch some more.

Side note: the sky was awesome today. Fox Hollow looked like an ice cream sunday with the mountains as the ice cream and the clouds as piles of whip cream sitting on top. Three in a row, just like a sunday.

HAPPY DANCE!!!!

I just got a totally exciting business call. Really exciting. It caused me to do a happy dance and go do acrobatics on my awesome mats. We'll have to see where this goes now. But right now it's exciting!

minus 90 degrees Fahrenheit

and people live there???????????

Welcome to the Coldest Town on Earth

I'm speachless.

anybody wanna roll?

By request, here's a picture of the mats (above)
and my other toys (below).

I usually call this the "Big Room"... cause it's big... but I was thinking today I should call it the Toy Room cause it's got all my toys in it. Except the car which is parked right on the other side of the wall to the left there.

And here are some pics of me playing on the mats.

stupid dreams

in my dream last night it was snowing and everyone was driving faster than normal and spinning all over the place.  i was going a safe speed trying to avoid the cars flying around me. i was about to go down this hill. i had my foot on the brake but when I started down the hill the angle changed and it was just a straight drop and freefall down. crunch.  

yeah. nice, huh. no dreams where I'm driving a car are ever good. they usually involve the brakes not working, me not being able to see where I'm going, meteors falling from the sky or some other crap like that.

except this time there was someone else in the car too and they had a hand on some of the controls. that was different. and so was the fact that I crashed at the bottom. i never crash. i'm always out of control, but I never crash.

stupid dreams

sore

from jiu-jitsu

from weights

from boxing

Sore is good.

txt messaging after midnight

Jills txt to Ellie (her caps, not mine) at 12:12am...

"MOE USED THE VACUUM CLEANER ON VOMIT"

(She's not much of a txt messager.)

What happened is that I'd just relayed the story from earlier tonight in Muay Thai class and she thought it was very important to let Ellie know asap.  She wanted to put "Happy New Year" first but this was her 2nd attempt and it had been almost 5 minutes in the making so she just sent it as is.

Earlier, I had been at Muay Thai and Moe was boxing with George and all of a sudden George is going in for a punch and so is Moe only George sees that Moe is not making the normal face for punching someone, it's a little more twisted up looking. Then he (warning: this is gross), he smells it coming and ducks out of the way just in time. Nasty. He mopped the mats down but then used the vacuum cleaner on the carpet. That just seems wrong.

New Years

I danced in the new year to drumming.

---

Dance, when you're broken open.

Dance, if you've torn the bandage off.

Dance in the middle of the fighting.

Dance in your blood.

Dance, when you're perfectly free.

- Rumi

---

I got carded twice tonight and the last guy told me I didn't look my age.  I wonder what age I do look to people on average. I'm sure everyone would have a different estimate.

green

I asked Stormy what color I should dye my hair for the Pam Ams. She thought for a sec and said, "green". So I said, "why?" And she said, "green for megaton... and you're like the Hulk." What??? I was laughing.

I said, "But I'm the smallest person in here." And she said, "Yeah, but..." and then kind of trailed off with something about me being strong or tough or something.

Green... I'll have to think about it. I do have green eyes but I'm not sure how good green hair would look on me. But I thought it was funny - her perception of me. It's interesting to find out how other people think of you. It never matches up to how you see yourself.

mats!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I got home and there were mats! I never got a tracking number or anything so I didn't know when they were coming. Plus with the holidays it might have been even slower. Could have been another two weeks. But no. THEY'RE HERE! And the FedEx guy left them in my "carport" instead of just sticking a note on my door.

I haven't been this excited since I moved up here and got to drive my car the first day I was here, thanks to the fact that my mom got a temporary registration for it. 

SWEET!!!

(there will be pics once I finish rearranging everything to fit them in there)

www.dollamur.com

New eyelash-lengthening drug approved

...Seriously?

There's genocide, war, poverty, etc. and you're going to spend $120/month on longer eyelashes???

Ok, I spend an inordinate amount of money on gas to drive nowhere on a regular basis, so we've all got our vices. But eyelashes? I'm never going to understand that. 

If you've got no eyelashes that's one thing. But you know there are going to be people with perfectly functioning eyelashes buying this stuff.

www.sciam.com 

when you didn't know you noticed

This afternoon I was driving up Willamette, which I've driven up a million times I'm sure (ok, maybe not, but definitely over 1000). I wasn't particularly paying attention to what was around me, I'm often not. At least I thought I wasn't. But I drove past this parking lot that has a sign out that says $40/month parking. And I noticed it because it was different. The number was higher and the size of the letters were bigger on the price. The funny thing is I've never paid any attention to this consciously. I never thought about the parking lot. If you had asked me before today, I couldn't have told you where it was, or if there even was one on Willamette. And I certainly couldn't have told you what it cost per month. I didn't even know that I noticed this. But today I noticed it because it was different, which somehow make it stick out and catch my attention. It set off this thing in my head that said, "that doesn't match". It didn't match what was in my memory I guess, even though I didn't know it was even in my memory.

It makes me think of how I took pictures without paying attention and then realized years later that I liked them. Some part of me was paying attention even though I wasn't conscious of it.

It also makes me think of this article on blindsight, because you can apparently perceive without "seeing" the way we normally think of it. I guess I was "seeing" this sign (and who knows what else), without even noticing that I was seeing it and remembering it.

I also noticed when I got back my car that there was this small circle of upholstery covering up this hole in the door panel. While something like that does go there, but this just looked wrong. It was the same as when I saw the sign. I just looked at it and knew that's not what went there. I don't remember what the one that goes there does look like but I knew that this wasn't it. So I looked at the rest of the door panel and it didn't match any of the other leather on the car so that made me think I was right that it wasn't the right piece. Then I looked over to the passenger side door and there was just a hole with the cover missing on that side. After that I was convinced. This thing was definitely not what went there. (New plugs are being ordered).

It's interesting how bad (really bad) I am at remembering peoples faces. I watched a movie this week and there were two with actresses with blond hair. They were in two different locations throughout the whole movie, until the end where they end up in the same room together... and I get them confused.  At the end of a scene I realize that the it wasn't the one I thought it was. Same thing happened last week and plenty of other times. If they've got two people that have the same hair, and they're not actors that I know, I get them confused. Maybe everybody does, but I kinda don't think so. Other people can picture what people look like in their head. I can't. When I try it's like trying to see without your glasses on - and you really need them. It's really really blurry.

On the other had I think I'm pretty good at seeing details. I've noticed it from learning/teaching martial arts. A lot of other people don't seem to see the same things I see. A few years back I learned this kata from a certain instructor. Another student learned it from the same instructor. We'd both know the kata for a while and he sees me practicing it and he asks where I learned to do this one fancy looking thing with my hands. I thought it was odd because I learned it by watching the instructor. He did it every time. Yet this other guy hadn't "seen" it.

I wonder if I'm good at seeing details just because I am, or if it's because I'm bad at remembering the whole picture, so I pick out details that I can use as recognition points. It can't be the other way around because I can know someone for my entire life and still not be able to picture their face. It doesn't mean I don't recognize them, it just means that I can't "see" a picture of them in my mind.

It feels like my brain remembers a lot of details but then doesn't know how to fit the pieces together. That's why I get lost when I'm driving. I remember things in pieces, but don't know what piece connects to what other piece. And when I'm learning a new move in bjj, the instructor will go over it several times and when he says to start drilling I can remember very well the last thing he said but I can't for the life of me remember what position we're supposed to start in. If someone tells me, then I remember and I can remember plenty of details about what he said he was doing. But the move as a whole is fragmented. I can remember details about certain parts but not always how to get from one part to another.

cows and sun

Driving on Territorial Highway I felt the sun shine through the window and warm me up. I haven't felt that in a while. Not that the sun hasn't been out at all but it somehow hasn't been warm, or mabye I just wasn't driving at the right angle before. In any event it was nice.

I turned down Crow Rd to and there were a couple cows standing right in the middle of the road. I got this pic with my iPhone from inside the car which is why it's not that clear.  I would have taken another but there was a semi coming up behind me. I've seen cows out before, but never in the middle of the road here! It was kind of fun. I had to do some evasive manuvering to get around them. They're like deer and try to run away by running down the middle of the road and cutting in front of your car. It's like their flight instincts use reverse psychology causeing them to dart in front of traffic instead of away from it. Go figure.

"Vision without execution is hallucination."

— Thomas A. Edison

"The three great essentials to achieve anything worth while are, first, hard work; second, stick-to-itiveness; third, common sense. " 

"What you are will show in what you do." 

"We often miss opportunity because it's dressed in overalls and looks like work" 

"I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work." 

"Negative results are just what I want. They’re just as valuable to me as positive results. I can never find the thing that does the job best until I find the ones that don’t." 

"Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up. " 

thumbs up

four adjectives

today I was described as...

"wild and crazy and interesting and weird. and I mean that with the most love, respect and awe."

hot food grip

As anyone knows, when you're dealing with hot food,
it's best to use the thumb and ring finger.

somebody stole my sleep last night

It's raining buckets outside

photography

I just realized this year that I liked photography. I've been taking pictures since 2003 but I didn't even see what I'd taken. Not the same way I see it now. It's kind of fun to look back at pictures that I took and I didn't really know why I was taking them at the time. I took them they just seemed interesting and I would just point and shoot at anything that caught my eye. But now I look back at some of them and wonder why I took them. I like them a lot but I don't even really understand why yet. I'm just more aware that I like them than I was before. 

It's curious, not even knowing how much or why you like something. I think it's just awareness and openness that contributes to seeing (yourself) that lets you discover these things. It's interesting that you can know you like something right away, even if you don't know you like it, or why. It's there, hidden, like a burried treasure waiting to be found.

December shots found here.

my car

How and why anyone would be sentimental over the hood of a car is beyond me.  Even though, well... apparently it is me.

I was driving earlier today and I realized that I missed the old hood, even though it is broken, with a big gaping hold in the middle. It's not like I was going to keep driving it around like that,  but for some reason the new hood feels different, like it doesn't fit right or doesn't belong, which, of course, doesn't make any sense at all. All the hoods come from the same mold. This one just has different paint. Objectively speaking this one is better than the old one beacuse I'd driven off paved roads into gravel and cracked the old one on the bottom... several times. This one is spotless. But still, it feels like it's not the right one. This is so stupid (but also kind of interesting). I think I just feel like I have history with the old hood. We've been 43,000 miles together. (This is really embarassing.)  Hopefully the new hood will last longer.

I've never been in a car crash but I've had...

• 67 VW Bug: a wheel fall off my car while I was driving it (kind of funny)
• 85 Porche 944: the brakes go out (drove back home before they quit altogether)
• 89 Mazda B2000: someone cracks my window to break in to the truck (took the quarters, left the cash?)
• 2000 VW Beetle: a palm frond fell on my windshield durring a storm and cracked it
• 2000 VW Beetle: a large (12 foot) tree branch fell on the right side of my car and crush the rear quarter panel (and the body shop broke the window while "fixing" the rest)
• 05 Lotus Elise: small something (stone, pebble?) flys through my drivers side window, right past my ear and obliterates the rear glass.
• 05 Lotus Elise: someone backs their trailer hitch through my hood
  

friends

the people who catch you when you fall.

and today the people that fed me.

McBeth Road

Snow clouds hold the color of the sun as it sets.

The ground is still covered in snow up on Fox Hollow,
except the roads which are slushy and icy.

got my car back

took the bus... the 51 was really empty, the 30 was very full and they gave out candy canes.

Ok, ok. I'm going to bed.

iPhone Apps

Cool! They have iPhone apps for everything, like learning stuff... like languages ;-)  You can load an ASL or Spanish dictionary onto your phone ;-)  SWEET!!!  iPhone rocks.

is it always that blue?

I think I somehow forgot how blue the sky is. The clouds broke earlier and the sky was so blue. Is it always like that? I guess it's just been overcast lately with the snow/rain combo. I don't even remember if I've seen blue sky lately or not. I just know that I saw some today and it was really vibrant, kind like the glowing green of the wet moss that the sun was shining on earlier today on Fox Hollow. Colors are like musical notes and in the right combination they make great music for your eyes.

Miniature Air Show

There was a miniature air show in my back yard this morning. There were 30 or 40 little birds, a little smaller than the size of your fist, flying around and picking at things. They were hopping around on their own at first but then one of them must have sounded some sort of alarm because they started flying up in groups for the fence or the tree above, sometimes with a few acrobatic loops on the way.

Winter Solstice Party

The door opens and Ziggy licks me in the face ;-P

dogs, friends, chatting, meditation, walking,  more dogs, hiking, graveyard, lights from the city through the trees, candles, rain, toasts, merriment, more walking, christmas lights, very nice old house with big windows and doorways, more people, new tastes...

I'd like to see the rest of that house sometime. I'm interested in architecture and layouts.

years & other random thoughts

Last week: I was talking to Jake the other day about I don't know what and I was remembering something from years back so I said I think it was in like 5th grade or something, so that would be like 22 years ago, and then I realised that he was only 23 and it just seemed weird.

Today: I went to baskin robins and the girl there asked me how long I'd been getting these (a blast). I thought about it and wasn't even sure if I wanted to say; it kind of surprised me when I thought about how long it was. I said, "I think about 8 years... I'm old" and she said said, "you don't look that old." How old is "that old"? How old do you have to be to buy ice cream anyway?

I don't really think I'm that old, though I'm sure Mel would beg to differ.  If she tries to imagine herself my age she thinks it seems old. I told her if Obama serves 8 years I'll be 40 when he's out of office.  I think her brain froze up. Either that or she was having so many thought her face froze while her mind spun. It was pretty funny.

It made me think of this article again... "Modern Foraging: Tried and True versus Novelty: Some of us prefer the tried and true, and others search high and low for novelty. Why?"

I don't think anybody fits entirely into one or the other category. In a way I'm all about novelty and trying new thing. But lots of things I just do because I know them and know I like them. 

I drive the same back roads and don't get tired of them. It's not cause I don't want to try new ones. It's just because these are the closest ones and they're pretty good. Not that I don't try others when I have more time. They're just convenient.

When I need to pick a route I usually like to test out all my options and then pick one way. I like taking the same path usually. But ocassionally I'll go a different way just to change it up.

I like to move my furniture around, always have. I was once up at three in the morning in high schoold trying to push my dresser into my closet (it would only work at one very specfic angle). 

I've moved my bed three times in the 19 months I've lived here.

At the gas station today the attendant told me he used to be a Chevy guy till he got his Bronco and now he's Ford all the way.  I wanted to say I used to be a Porsche person till I drove a Lotus. Aaaaaaaaaah, the Lotus. Not that I don't like Porsches.  I just like the Lotus better.  Cheaper, slicker and more fun. And better gas mileage.

Learning/finding new things is exciting and expands your world. Old things are comfortable and easy. Both are good. 

I don't really feel I'm one way or the other; I'm both. I think you need both.

snow stuff

This is the south west section of Fox Hollow. The part you get to after driving down the hill and around the 180 degree turn, past the farm that usually has a motorcycle parked out by their gate.  It was fun driving on the snow covered road in the Bronco. It was probably about 8 inches deep at least. 

I followed Fox Hollow out to Lorane Highway, which had apparently been eating trucks for breakfast. I passed three of them stuck in the ravine along various parts of the road. It was pretty steep too. One of the trucks was almost at a 90 degree angle.

I can't figure out if it was just trucks becasue no one else would try the roads or becasue the truck owners were overconfident in their vehicles and going faster than they should have been.

sweet! mats are on sale...

This is one holiday sale that I'm excited about - $75 off!

color blind

I'd like some special glasses that will show me what it's like to be color blind. Just so I could see what other people see. Today Ben asked me if I dyed my hair (because Harold asked him). I thought he was kidding considering the shade it currently is - until he said that he was color blind and it just looked a little darker. Apparently greens and browns look similar to him and he can't tell purple and blue apart either. Everything must look so completely different that way.

Ok, I just did some googling and of course there's a website for everything:

http://www.etre.com/tools/colourblindsimulator/

I guess my head looks a darker shade of green to him. Weird.

How strange, imagine never seeing those colors... I'm so glad I'm not color blind.

11 degrees

If it's 11 degrees out now, how cold is it going to be later tonight???

KCRW: Today's Top Tune

This podcast is great. It's one song a day, from all over the place. Today's song is Tahra A Issasnanane by Terakaft, which I really like. I also like this one: School of Seven Bells: iamundernodisguise. There are lots of good ones. It's an easy way to find new music and add a bunch of free songs to your ipod. I've got like 20 on there now... new music is exciting.

driving in snow/ice

Very glad to have the Bronco. There is zero chance I'd be driving the Lotus today. 

There was one guy stuck in a truck with his back wheels spinning in the middle of a lane. And I saw a couple people trying to make right turns that came out way wider than they anticipated (they ended up in the wrong lane).

And I almost ran into a tree making a turn onto scenic at like 3 mph. Ice!!!!

Here's the back yard...

River road

Driving on river road is like sledding for adults!

bronco vs. lotus

Lotus FTW! ...except in the snow, and maybe the rain, or if you have more than two people, or a lot of luggage, or you can want to transport something bigger than a vacuum cleaner ;-)

Driving the Bronco is like driving a couch. It's big and cushy and comfy, but doesn't corner well. There's so much padding that you can't feel the road. Big tires, bouncy suspension, power steering, giant padded seats - this is the Bronco.  The Lotus has none of these and it's all for the best. 

With the Lotus you can feel the road, like you're touching it with your own hand. You can feel it everywhere - through the seat, the steering wheel, the gas pedal, the shifter. It's like you and the car are one machine, with the same purpose. The car becomes and extension of you as you follow the twists and turns of the road...

oops, daydreaming...

Um, yeah. So the Bronco is good in it's own way. I'm glad I have it. It's good to be able to just take off in the snow for one ;-)  I saw an article in the paper the other day about 3 hour lines at the tire stores for people trying to get winter tires on their cars before the snow arrived. And the Bronco is a lot warmer. The heat in the Lotus takes forever to come on and everything's metal - cold metal. But that's ok, it's not meant for driving in freezing temps anyway. That's what the Bronco is for.

It's kind of confining though, having to drive the Bronco instead of the Lotus. I feel like a soda bottle that's been all shook up. I want to d r i v e, but I can't. Steping on the gas with any force is pointless. The thing is going to accelerate when it's good and ready, which is apparently not on my schedule. And going around the corners is just not the same. If you go too fast you just feel like you're about to tip over - not exciting at all. The whole point of cornering fast is to feel the grip and the g-force.

Well, for now I'll enjoy the snow.

white

it's so bright and white out!

Time for nightime snow driving

totally snowing outside!!

freaken awesome ;-)

red

photoshopped iPhone pic

awake

I am not even close to tired. I even set my alarm last night so I'd get up earlier and hopefully get tired earlier but it's not working yet. I'm so not tired. Trying to go to sleep when you're not tired is really boring. I need another book.

I bet my car looks like this right now:

Pretty unattractive.
It will look better when it gets a new one of these:

Seems as good a time as any to have it in the shop since it's gonna be all snowy this week. At least where I like to drive it will be, maybe here too, we'll see tomorrow.

Oh, I know.  I'm gonna read my camera manual. Gotta figure out what all those settings do, especially now that I have the tripod.

Tripod!

This is my back yard.

about last night

This one is from today.

Last night was pretty amazing. Three things coming together: full moon - at it's brightest due to it being closest to earth - and first snow. That doesn't happen very often. Perfect conditions.

When I first got up there the moon was so bright that I could turn off my headlights and drive... at night, in the dark, out of the city. So the only light was the moon, big and bright and right overhead. No real clouds, just smoke-like fog, light and fast, moving just over the trees past the moon. And stars, lots of stars. It was very clear out.

There was already a thin layer of snow on the ground and a few flakes were falling. I got out and stood in the cold air stairing up at the moon for a few minutes. As I drove out further the snow clouds moved in. On my way back I drove into the fog and it was like entering another world -snow flakes flying at me, illuminated by the headlights. It makes it seem like you're driving in space with stars flying past you.

that was awesome

Wispy clouds raced past the moon and then the snow started falling.

It was like driving in a snow globe ;-)

omg... It's so beautiful out here...

It's totally snowing on Fox Hollow...right now

and the moon is so so bright...

The Years Biggest/Brightest Full Moon

Every few years, a full moon coincides with the point in the satellite's elliptical orbit that brings it closest to the center of the Earth. Friday night, the moon will be fully illuminated just four hours after reaching that point, according to a feature story on the National Aeronautics and Space Administration's Web site.

The moon will appear up to 14 percent larger and 30 percent brighter than "lesser full moons we've seen earlier in 2008," NASA says -- provided it is being viewed in a clear sky.

cnn.com

The final leaves are falling...

The leaves on this little tree have hung on the longest. The cherry trees have been bare for months and the pears went next. But these leaves have changed colors slowly and are now a very bright red. 

The Daily Show: End Times Countdown - Bush Exit Interviews

The Daily Show With Jon StewartM - Th 11p / 10c

End Times Countdown - Bush Exit Interviews

Barack Obama Interview
John McCain Interview

Sarah Palin Video
Funny Election Video

Embarassinginly dumb. Makes me want to hide.

i miss my car

;-(

... I know, I'm a dork (but I don't care).

jiu-jitsu is awesome

Melissa couldn't make her lesson today so I got to fill in for her. Luv, luv, luv jiu-jitsu.

Fresh Air: The Secret Life Of Baboons

I heard the first part of the baboon story in my car, then I went back today and listened to the rest of it on podcast. The whole thing is pretty interesting but the story about the guy climbing the tree to get away from the pack of lions is pretty funny. Especially when they come back later and try to climb the same tree. 

Fresh Air

The Onion: Either Someone 14th Caller Or Everything On Fire At Spanish Radio Station

SAN JOSE, CA—According to sources, either a listener of local Spanish-language radio program Mañana Gigante con Luis y Moon Dog has just won some sort of promotional contest by being the 14th caller or the entire radio station is currently engulfed in flames. Protracted screams of "aye, aye, aye, muy caliente!" and "en fuego!" could be heard on the broadcast of either the celebratory exultation or out-of-control blaze, and were accompanied by the sounds of loud sirens, breaking glass, and dogs barking...

The Onion

exactly

I am always doing that which I can not do, in order that I may learn how to do it.

  - Pablo Picasso

rude!

This is what I found coming out of NWMA tonight. The police said a witness called in the licence plate of whoever did it (they didn't stick around). Looks like the tow hitch of a truck to me. It's like someone punch my car right in the nose ;-(

south africa

ha ha. just called a client at 2 in the morning. but that's cause they're in south africa. time zone freakiness.

still it was kind of weird. i'm wide awake and I'm they are too, but it just seems like you shouldn't call clients at 2am... I guess I just picture everyone being asleep at this time, even though clearly much of the world is awake right now, just not most of the people that are geographically near me.

TDSServ

Finally got this lame ass virus off my computer after like 3 hours. I couldn't do a system restore, it would just hang. It didn't want to let me delete the registry keys. I looked it up and figured out how to change the permissions on the registry keys and then remove them. I scanned with PCTools and it would say it removed it but every time I rebooted the freakin thing would reintall. 

Finally I downloaded ComboFix which killed the last of it after two runs through. Blech. I've only ever had one other virus on my computer before in like 12 years, and that was at least two computers ago. Not sure where this one came from but from what I read it's a bugger to remove. Lots of people resorted to reinstalling the OS.  Something I'd actually like to do just to clean things up a bit. But I'd like to do it on my own time, not because I'm forced to. Anyway, I won this round.

Brrr...

I thought it was cold today (as in cold enough that I wanted to stay in my house where it's warm and not go out driving cause the Lotus is like a refrigerator with it's slick metal interior). But then I looked at the 10 day forecast and next weekend looks a lot colder! Brrr. Of course that's the weather forecast so things could change. But I'm going to be getting mentally ready (to hide under the covers).

As a side note, post sunset on Northwest Expressway was pretty cool. It was a cloudless dingy gray all day. But right at the end there were a few clouds of various shades of more gray along the horizon. And behind them was red, bleeding into and mixing with the clouds, like dye in the washing machine. Pretty cool.

Ouch!

Apparently I helped brake off part of Elenah's front tooth, or my knee did. There was some move where we both rolled over and she came up and my knee hit her under the chin. Then she went home and part of her tooth came off. Oops! (She said it's not that bad and she'll get it fixed over the break.) But that kinda sucks.

I accidentally dislocated someone's jaw once, that was directly my fault as opposed to the knee/jaw collision here.  It's important to keep your mouth closed in contact sports. I really don't understand why there are people who chew gum in jiu-jitsu.  WTF people?  You could choke on it or spit it on someone or on the mat or you could end up with your mouth open when something lands on your chin.  All around bad idea. 

I fractured someone's rib once too, but I think that was his fault cause he put his arms up and told me to hit him so I did (while we were training of course). He was a bodybuilder. I don't think he realized that lifting weights doesn't strengthen your ribs.

This sounds bad but I actually have good control and people rarely get injured from me. I can't say the same about the girl who kneed me in the eye socked after the Marcelo Garcia seminar. Apparently she's know for kneeing people in the face... in jiu-jitsu. That's wrong.

jiu-jitsu makes my day

today I remembered some moves that I had seen a couple times but didn't ever do, probably because they didn't fit into my game as well back then. now I think they'll fit really well. can't wait to try them out.

Empty

Happiness Is Contagious

A happy person within a social circle quickly influences those around him or her to be happy, extending to three degrees of separation... 60 second podcast

inadequate

finished the billing, but I only have three stamps...

Tire Review

I've put over 1000 miles on the new tires now so I guess they're worn in. I think it was a good choice. The tires don't spin on the wet crosswalk paint when I'm turning onto River Loop #2 so they've definitely got more rain grip. And the roads are often damp from rain or fog now anyway so they're working out really well for the price. Especially if they last a lot longer than the other tires which I expect they will. Now we just wait to see how long.

eugene has gooooooooooooooooood sunsets...

that's all i have to say.

Irvington and NW Expy

Leah's faux blog

You should make yourself a blog or I'm just going to start posting stuff for you...

Leah: "I have been missing the intensity of exercise and training, and realizing I won't be able to last for 6 months before I do something more interesting than a weekly pilates class..... so....................... I checked out a brazilian jujitsu studio on Monday night. I'll be able to go three times a week.  I am completely in love, and I've found my sport of choice for the fall, winter and spring. EVERY single muscle in my body is sore. So maybe you guys can come watch me in a jujitsu tournament one day. We'll see.   I am VERY excited about this.  Mostly Annie's idea, and it was a good one!"

Yeah for Jiu-Jitsu!!!

Lorane Highway

Sun, sun, sun, driving, big puffy clouds!

Waiting for my sandwich...playing with my phone.

leah goes to jiu-jitsu

I told you, I told you. I knew you'd like it. Now you're going to have to tell me all the moves your learning.

Venus, Jupiter and the Moon

"...the two brightest planets—Venus and Jupiter—with the waxing crescent Moon joining them on the first evening of December" Article...

This should be interesting. I totally noticed Venus & Jupiter the last couple days but didn't know which planets they were, just that they were very bright.